Fourth Time in Love

My fourth love was another girl that I met on IRC.  This one lived in California.  We had been chatting for a couple weeks (flirting and private chatting had only been going on for about 3 or 4 days at this point) when she asked me to come see her and bought my plane ticket.  I was floored, I'd been chatting online for many years at this point and had spoken with many women, this was the first one that bought a plane ticket for her or me.

A few days after she bought the ticket was 9/11/01.  My flight was not for a couple weeks yet, but I was afraid that it might now be canceled.  As it turns out, they started letting people fly again about 4 days before my flight left.  So I flew out to see her and we hit it off great (even though I was extremely nervous that she wouldn't like me after meeting me in person).  Even her mom liked me (even though she tried to hate me as she told me later).

So things were good, we fell in love, she came here next a couple weeks after my visit there and then I went there for Thanksgiving.  I flew from FL to CA and then to Reno (they have family there they decided to spend Thanksgiving with after my plane tickets were already purchased) with them and then back to CA for a day or two before I flew back home.  It was a fantastic trip, I finally met her father and all of her family and I got along well.  I flew back home after a nice stay, feeling like I was on top of the world.

She decides to buy me another plane ticket to come visit her about 3 weeks after Thanksgiving.  We buy the tickets and then I realize that the weekend we bought the tickets for is my friend's wedding.  We end up changing the tickets for the weekend before Christmas (about 2 weeks later).  Shortly after we change the ticket I find out that she's still in touch with her ex that treated her like dirt.. and still in love with him.  We spend many hours talking on the phone, me trying to understand what happened and her telling me how she can't make me understand what she doesn't understand.

I consider canceling my trip to see her, but end up going after all.  While we're in the hotel room one night, he calls just to let her know that he arrived safely in LA.  She chats with him on the phone for a bit and then tells him that she loves him as she's hanging up with him.  I am outraged and fuming.  I get up, put my shoes on and start packing my stuff.  My plane didn't leave for another day & a half, but I had to get out of there.  She sees me tying my shoes and asks me what I'm doing.  I said, "I'm leaving, I don't know where I'm going, but I can't stay here."  She ends up talking me into staying after me telling her how I couldn't believe how she could tell me she loves me with one breath and tells him the same thing with the other.  I end up staying and then flying home a couple days later.  When I get home I decide to tell her that she needs to make a choice between me & him.  I can't be the other man and he lives there, so what chance do I have against him?  She asks for some time to think about it.  I agree to a few days.  Christmas comes and goes and I ask her for her decision.  She tells me that she can't decide and asks for a couple more days.  After much arguing, I give in and tell her if she doesn't make a choice then I will make it for her and leave.

A couple days go by and once again she has made no choice.  So, I break up with her, even though it breaks my own heart in the process...

I stopped talking to her for a time and even stopped chatting on IRC not too much longer after this.  We have since let our past be our past and are now friends again.  She actually got married to a different guy she met on IRC and moved to Australia with him.  She seems happy and I'm glad.  I wish things had turned out so well for me...